The next day, David called. He asked about Matt and how we knew each other. I told him that ever since I met Matt in the line to buy student season tickets for the BYU football games, I felt like I had known him forever. He was just one of those people that you’re pretty sure you knew in the pre-existence. We went dancing a lot in UT, but hadn’t dated. I had given him a watch for Christmas, and he had given me a sweater. Not really a big deal. (Sort of) He also sang When in Rome’s “The Promise” to me once in the café when he had hurt my feelings somehow, but I didn’t mention that, right then. During this very phone call, David told me that he thought we shouldn’t see other people anymore. We should be exclusive. Hmm, funny how things change! I didn’t even go out with this guy, but I got an extreme feeling of goose/ganderism going on.
However, when it boiled right down to it, being exclusive with David was exactly what I wanted. So, I agreed. David began this silly little game of telling me that he really “liked” me, and in fact, maybe even “loked” me (a cross between love and like, of course). The “loke” joke went on for what seemed like ever. I was pretty well smitten by this time and could quite easily acknowledge to myself that I was head over heels in love with David. There was no way, no how, no siree that I was ever going to admit that to him unless he said it first. I was a 1st class chicken, maybe even a little bit burnt.
After many conversations about this, one night he broke down and actually said it. Something like, “Monique, I’m pretty sure that I do actually sort of love you.”
My response, “What did you say?”
“I said that I love you.”
Now, suddenly, after months of up and down and back and forth and joy and pain and sunshine and rain (Oh, wait, I got off track there.) Anyway, now it was really awkward to be in this situation of, for the first time ever in my life, telling someone that I was not related to that I loved them.
“Oh, um, (suddenly my throat is very dry and my heart is racing), uh, I think I love you too.”